3 ways to ruin your life - new lune

3 Ways To Ruin Your Life.

People often talk about ways to improve your life and on how to live happily but they don’t talk about the potential ways you could ruin your life which I think is as important, if not more. In today’s post, I wanted to share with you 3 ways that can ruin your life. Without further ado, let’s jump into the post!

Les gens parlent souvent des moyens d’améliorer votre vie et de vivre heureux, mais ils ne parlent pas des moyens potentiels de ruiner votre vie, ce qui, à mon avis, est tout aussi important, sinon plus. Dans le post d’aujourd’hui, je voulais partager avec vous 3 façons qui peuvent ruiner votre vie. Sans plus tarder, passons au post !

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BEING DISHONEST

Dishonesty will not take you anywhere in life, let alone to a bright path. We all lie from time to time, I will be the first person to admit that. Whether that white lie in question was said, not to hurt another person’s feelings or to protect yourself, we all know the consequences of our actions. But in this case I’m talking about when you are not honest with your words, actions and yourself.

If you have to put up a facade in front of others, if you have ulterior motives when befriending someone, if you are faking your emotions when being with someone, etc. – then you are ruining not only your life but you are also impacting other people’s lives through your actions. This won’t lead you to a good place at all and you will never be able to experience inner happiness and peace.

La malhonnêteté ne vous mènera pas n’importe où dans la vie, encore moins sur un chemin lumineux. Nous mentons tous de temps en temps, je serai la première personne à l’admettre. Que ce pieux mensonge en question ait été dit, pour ne pas blesser les sentiments d’une autre personne ou pour vous protéger, nous connaissons tous les conséquences de nos actions. Mais dans ce cas, je parle de quand vous n’êtes pas honnête avec vos paroles, vos actions et vous-même.

Si vous devez mettre en place une façade devant les autres, si vous avez des arrière-pensées lorsque vous vous liez d’amitié avec quelqu’un, si vous simulez vos émotions lorsque vous êtes avec quelqu’un, etc. – alors vous ruinez non seulement votre vie, mais vous avez également un impact sur la vie des autres gens par vos actions. Cela ne vous mènera pas du tout à un bon endroit et vous ne pourrez jamais expérimenter le bonheur et la paix intérieure.

Related: Things Bloggers Lie About

 

FOCUSING DEEPLY ON THE LAW OF ATTRACTION

This might be something that a lot of people will disagree with me but I stand by my opinion haha. I’m pretty sure most people know or are familiar with the term “law of attraction” and manifestation, it’s a topic that has been getting very popular as each year pass. If you aren’t familiar with it, it’s the belief system that you receive what you put out. For instance, if you think & do positive things then you will get positive experiences and vice versa.

I’m not going to lie, it’s a belief system that I truly believe in but only to a certain extent. I’m a firm believer that if you do negative things in life, it will come right back at you. However, the notion that your negative thoughts can have an impact on your life is a bit unhealthy to me. We all have negative thoughts and go through negative phases in our lives from time to time, that’s human nature.

You can’t blame yourself for thinking this way. By creating this mindset, it will only make you feel stressed out & bad about yourself if you do end up having those negative thoughts that you can’t even control yourself. It’s important to be mindful of your thoughts & actions but your mental health, especially the thoughts you have in your head – don’t control the sequence of events in your life.

C’est peut-être quelque chose que beaucoup de gens ne seront pas d’accord avec moi, mais je maintiens mon opinion haha. Je suis presque sûr que la plupart des gens connaissent le terme “loi de l’attraction” et la manifestation, c’est un sujet qui devient très populaire au fil des années. Si vous ne le connaissez pas, c’est le système de croyance selon lequel vous recevez ce que vous émettez. Par exemple, si vous pensez et faites des choses positives, vous obtiendrez des expériences positives et vice versa.

Je ne vais pas mentir, c’est un système de croyance auquel je crois vraiment mais seulement dans une certaine mesure. Je crois fermement que si vous faites des choses négatives dans la vie, cela vous reviendra directement. Cependant, l’idée que vos pensées négatives peuvent avoir un impact sur votre vie est un peu malsaine pour moi. Nous avons tous des pensées négatives et traversons de temps en temps des phases négatives dans notre vie, c’est la nature humaine.

Vous ne pouvez pas vous en vouloir de penser ainsi. En créant cet état d’esprit, vous ne vous sentirez stressé et mal dans votre peau si vous finissez par avoir ces pensées négatives que vous ne pouvez même pas contrôler vous-même. Il est important d’être conscient de vos pensées et de vos actions, mais votre santé mentale, en particulier les pensées que vous avez dans la tête, ne contrôle pas la séquence des événements de votre vie.

Related: 5 Ways To Manage Your Anxiety & Stress

 

HAVING A VENGEFUL SPIRIT

When someone hurts you, our first reaction is to hurt them back and make them feel the same amount of pain. At least, that’s what most people think. Once again, that’s human nature and that thought you have for one second doesn’t represent your morals, values or you as a person.

However, we all reach a point where we realise that you only get true satisfaction when you move on from that person/experience and live your life. Keeping that deep anger & hatred won’t help heal yourself nor help you move on from that bad experience. The best revenge is to heal and not inflict pain back, including to the person who broke you apart.

Quand quelqu’un vous fait du mal, notre première réaction est de lui faire du mal en retour et de lui faire ressentir la même douleur. Du moins, c’est ce que la plupart des gens pensent. Encore une fois, c’est la nature humaine et cette pensée que vous avez pendant une seconde ne représente pas votre morale, vos valeurs ou vous en tant que personne.

Cependant, nous atteignons tous un point où nous réalisons que vous n’obtenez une véritable satisfaction que lorsque vous quittez cette personne/expérience et que vous vivez votre vie. Garder cette colère et cette haine profondes ne vous aidera pas à vous guérir ni à sortir de cette mauvaise expérience. La meilleure vengeance est de guérir et de ne pas infliger de douleur en retour, y compris à la personne qui vous a brisé.

Related: How To Deal With Haters In Real Life.


Thank you so much for reading! – xo N

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  1. Great Post.I think life is about balance try to be positive yes, but also accept that things will somtimes go wrong, or not turn out as you would like but that is just life. But allow yourself to feel fed up/happy, it;s not a sign of weakness.

  2. I agree with all of this, it’s interesting concerning manifestation because it is so popular these days but negative thoughts are inevitable sometimes and not everything works out as planned

  3. I do believe excessive negative thoughts can affect you physically. It can change eating and sleeping patterns, cause eating disorders and excessive smoking, and a host of other things that affect your overall health. Good post!

    1. Absolutely! Those are all things that will have consequences but thoughts that are created by the negative voice in your head won’t have consequences unless you give them power. You can’t let those negative thoughts dictate or control you, or even create fear that something bad is going to happen. Thank you so much lovely ❤️

  4. i love your points. i agree some people can take loa so far, just like zero waste/ or minimalism, veganism like you gotta do what you can and dont beat yourself up for it. i think it might come down to perfectionism too.

    1. I completely agree with you! I agree with the core foundation of those things but if you start focusing on every single aspect, it can quickly turn into something unhealthy. Thank you so much for reading hun ❤️

  5. It’s helpful advise. Dishonesty creates a web were you get caught up in. And being vengeful wears yourself out. Forgiving can be liberating to some extent.

  6. Yet again! *EXCELLENT* beauty tips — not a joke: inner beauty shines quite brightly! 😀

    1. As others have commented on NL’s mention of LOA, I thought I’d add my 2 bits too.

      I read *some* of the book — but only as much as I could stomach (not much 😉 ).

      I find it dangerous. IMHO people should focus more attention on improving their literacy skills rather than to succumb to such quackery. If anyone wants to know what I would suggest to improve literacy skills, feel free to HMU about it!

      🙂 Norbert

  7. I honestly don’t believe in law of attraction neither, I try to be a better person each day for myself and my well being. I think if I’m good everyone around me will be good too — vengeance is definitely a bad thing with no doubt in mind it will destroy your life and block all your blessings.

    1. If you put negative energy out there such as hatred and rage, it will inevitably turn into vengeance depending on the situation which will definitely come back at you one way or another. Thank you so much for reading ❤️

  8. Interesting perspective on Law of Attraction. I have never thought of it that way. I myself have never got into manifestations but never really thought about why. Your views on it are very similar to how I look at it too.

  9. Another great post, thank you for sharing. Having recently broken up with someone who was abusive towards me and coming to realise that my parents too were abusive, forgiveness and healing is something that I’ve been working on a lot, through meditation. Of course I can be angry and vengeful, but what good does it do? Instead I decide to be honest, share my story, be honest about who did it to me and no more. I won’t hide who they are because I believe that hiding their identity allows them to continue to control and influence me and doesn’t hold them accountable, but there is a difference between sharing your story and being cruel back. Sharing your story and healing from anger is cathartic, but the more you hold on to anger, the only one hurting is you.

    Your point about lying is true too. I have a neighbour who is a compulsive liar, and people always want to know if I get on with him, what I think of him etc. They think he’s a bit weird, mean and so on, and that’s all because my other neighbours have realised that he lies. At first I was amazed and impressed when he said he’d done some digital security work for Mark Zuckerberg, then when he said he’d worked out with Sylvester Stallone, cofounded Badoo and was best friends with Miley Cyrus? I knew that something was up.

    And now, jf I could just do something about my intrusive thoughts…

    1. Thank you so much, Helen ❤️ I’m so sorry to hear that you went through such abuse and I’m so proud of you for sharing your story to others. It takes a lot of courage to say it to the world and it will definitely help others who are/were in the same situation as yours. Holding onto that anger is venomous, it makes you turn into a person you are not and still gives them power to control you. But the moment you let go of that anger, they won’t have a hold on you anymore.

      Your neighbour reminds me of someone who was a compulsive liar, their stories just get more and more over the top, don’t they?

      Our mind is our biggest enemy. Shutting that negative voice in your head is so hard but the more you focus on things that you enjoy and keep yourself busy, the less audible that voice becomes. It’s not an easy journey but it’s a life long one, many of us are in the same boat which makes this ride not lonely..

      Thank you so much for reading ☺️

    2. Thank you, you’re definitely right. I think the common mistake though is people think that the “letting go” process is just sayng it once and then moving on, but that’s not the case. You don’t forget what happened, but you do get to a point where you can live with it without being acrimonious about it. It’s also not to say that it’s not a bit stinky sometimes too, but again, you don’t feel the need to be vengeful either. It happened, it’s your story, you can’t go back and edit it, so why try? What I can say though, and proudly, is that I’m in a relationship with someone else now, someone truly supportive, accepting and wonderful. He’s been a great friend of mine for several years and through some really challenging times, and those feelings started to creep in so I admitted them to him – it turns out, it was mutual!

      Oh heavens, totally! The funny thing is, when they don’t lie and don’t try to show off then you see how vulnerable and likeable they really are, but then the defenses go back up and the lying starts again. It’s such a shame because they’re only doing themselves out of great connections in the end.

      Oh yes, just two days ago actually I went on a news hiatus. It’s never good news, is it? It only leads you to believe things are getting worse. It got to the point that I was lying in bed, paralysed with fear. My do-do list now has 115 items on it (I use a chore app to help me stay organised) and I just realised that something had to give. I’m not up to date on all of the goings on in the world now and to be honest, even if that feels scary and it sounds selfish, it’s better for me to support causes (noteably the Red Cross, who were also there for me when I needed them) instead. There are people far, far above me who are paid handsomely to make he right decisions, I just have to trust them. I think you’re right though, realising that lots of people get anxious and sad helps us all support one another. I think it’s great that we talk about mental health now in the same way that we talk about other illnesses and diseases.

      A pleasure as always, and thank you for replying to me 🙂

  10. These are really great points. Dishonesty really comes back to bite you in the butt at some point and holding on to anger only leads to unhappiness and internal chaos. I really like your point about The Law Of Attraction. Your mind thinks, and we latch on to negative things more easily as a defence mechanism. But that doesn’t define who you are. Only your action dictate the reality you live in. Nothing is wrong with trying to think more positive but guilt-tripping yourself to think better is unhealthy and it makes for a stressful life.

  11. Much of what you write makes sense. Perhaps you will reconsider your position on negative thoughts. I find them very powerful and life controlling But there is a tried and true method that changes things for the better. Befriend them. Love them. This will help you to overcome your fear of them. Then over time they will naturally transform into positive energy. A simple though poorly explained Buddhist technique.
    Brian

  12. This is a really nice read. And I don’t exactly subscribe to the whole “only think positive” attitude because I’m human and there will be days when I will get negative thoughts and I can’t do anything about that. I feel that just like how you’d let yourself feel the good emotions, you should also let yourself feel the bad and ugly

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