dating resolutions for 2020 - silver dating - new lune

Resolutions For 2020

{AD} I have never been the type of person to make New Year’s resolutions because I don’t like the idea of putting too much pressure on myself in case I don’t get to accomplish them. But last year, I decided to make a couple of them and surprisingly I was able to achieve them.

This year’s resolutions are pretty much very similar to last year’s ones but more personal. I know many of my readers are single and at a weird stage in their life when everyone are in a relationship and their loved ones pressuring them to date someone otherwise they wouldn’t be able to find the “one”.

This definitely can have an impact on yourself and the way you view yourself and in today’s post, I wanted to share my resolutions when it comes to the next chapter of my life and hopefully they will help you too.

Related: Too Independent To Find Love?

 

TRUST YOUR INTUITION

It doesn’t matter if the entire world is telling you to do something, you know what’s best for yourself and the same goes for the person you are going to date or spend the rest of your life with (hopefully). If you feel uncomfortable or don’t feel like spending time with a person, be honest with yourself and follow your instinct. It will never disappoint you.

There is always a valid reason behind every choice you make even if sometimes you can’t verbalise your thoughts and it’s only a feeling. You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone, just trust your heart. If your intuition is telling you to get away from a situation or someone, please remove yourself from that situation/person.

Even if others pressure you to date or be with someone by telling you excuses, it’s your life and at the end of the day – they are not going to be the ones living it. This applies to all the relationships, platonic or romantic – even for decisions, choices and actions as well. If you don’t feel good about something, there is always a very good reason for it and you don’t have to justify yourself.

Related: Dating & Relationships in the UK vs France

 

TRUST THE TIMING OF YOUR LIFE

Another thing people or should I say the society puts pressure is on the goals you should achieve before a certain age. For example, you should graduate before you are 21 and that you should have a successful career at the age of 25, the list goes on. The same applies even for relationships and marriage. If you are not in a serious relationship or married before you approach your late twenties that you are doomed.

Obviously this varies depending on the culture, community or family you have but it’s just so sad to think that way. Some people might get married in their 20s and then get divorced a couple of years later whereas others might get married in their 40s and have a happy marriage for the rest of their life. You shouldn’t put a timeline on people’s age and goals. Sometimes it’s better being single and happy than be in a unhappy relationship.

There are so many ways to find someone whether it’s through common friends or dating websites, there is always an option available. There are even websites for senior dating such as silver-dating.com so I don’t think your age will ever limit your from finding someone. Live your life to the fullest and you will definitely find the right person when you least expect it. This does not only apply for your romantic relationship but for anything in life, whether it’s your career, goals or dreams. Just trust the timing of your life!

Related: Is There A Right Time To Get Pregnant?

 

TAKE CARE OF YOUR MIND & BODY

dating resolutions for 2020 - silver dating - new lune - relationship

One of the reasons why I didn’t choose to date when I was at school/uni was because I wanted to love myself first. As cheesy and cliche as it is, loving myself was on the top of my priority list. More than loving, respecting myself was very much important to me. If I wasn’t kind to myself then how will another person be? Not only during this time I learnt to be more mindful about my thoughts towards myself but I learnt to embrace and accept my flaws and insecurities as well.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you wouldn’t be able to love someone if you didn’t love yourself because that’s entirely false. What I’m saying is quite the opposite, in order for you to have a healthy relationship – you need to accept who you are as a person. This goes both ways whether you are a man or a woman. Some relationships can bring the worst in us. It doesn’t mean that the other person was toxic, sometimes we can be the source of that toxicity.

This brings me to the actual resolution which is to take care of your mind & body. This might not be entirely different to loving yourself but it definitely plays a huge part when it comes to being happy and confident. Making sure that your physical and mental health are in a good place will guarantee for a much happier life. When you feel your best, it will attract the right people in your life.

Related: 10 Goals To Set In Life

 

DON’T COMPARE

I think it’s so easy to compare yourself with other people, even if you are happily single especially with social media and everything. It may seem like everyone is living their best life and have found their partner but you never know what’s going on behind closed doors. You might think everyone found their perfect match but sometimes it’s only an illusion.

There are so many things that go behind a relationship and it’s not always sunshine and rainbows. You need to make a lot of sacrifices, compromises and choices in order to make the relationship work. Obviously there are amazing moment but there are also down moments.

You never know, they might think your single life is amazing and feel miserable in their relationship so there is no need to compare yourself with another person, let alone with a couple. Comparing will bring unnecessary toxicity and negativity when you could be enjoying your life.

Related: 10 Things That Had An Impact On My Happiness

 

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING!

xo N

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  1. A brilliant post and so true in all you say here.
    It’s good that you did not fall to the pressure of finding love and instead choosing to love yours first. At school, I had no thoughts of boys, but this was because I was always bullied in some way and so I didn’t have any confidence to grow. Finding my confidence and growth came as an adult and loving myself first in my late 20’s.
    I have been pressured in the past to go and find that one, or go witj a male friend I have. But that route will never be for me and like you say, we all have to do what is right for ourselves. Not what someone else thinks.

    1. Thank you so much, Liz! ❤️ I’ve been always been bullied at school so I’m learning to grow my confidence only recently now. If there is something I’ve learnt is that I don’t want to feel pressurised by others to make them happy.

    2. I think when leaving school is the time we start learning for the better. I am certainly like you where I won’t bow down to pressure of what other people think I should be doing. 😊

  2. very good advice…all of which I have followed! I didn’t date for 12 years…didn’t think it was right to be bringing a new guy into my sons life every so often. When I broke up with my last boyfriend, that was it until 2017 when I met my current boyfriend. My son – and ultimately my own – happiness were more important than having a guy around. This gave me the freedom to focus on my son, myself and my family.
    Thanks for sharing this!

  3. These are excellent resolutions my friend. I too try not to make to many resolutions but I did make a few this year. I always want to be better each year. That’s usually my main goal. I don’t want to be next year the same place I was before, like not moving forward. Always take care of my mental health, be kind, do what makes God happy! Thanks for sharing my friend. Have a wonderful blessed day ❤

  4. From my experience married at 22, divorced at 28, now 40 and still single. However am dating a wonderful and working towards marriage. She is 12 years younger. I have dated older and younger and same age and have realized it’s about the person. Not the age or whatever else the world says. And yes you need to love yourself before you can love someone else and you need to be secure about yourself. Allow yourself to grow and get into a relationship and marriage when you ready.

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