When something is going wrong and you feel like you’re in a very bad place in your life, it’s really hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve been there and I think we’ve all been there, I’ve gathered 10 ways to be happier which are the things I usually do to bring back my positive motto when I feel like my energy has drained.
Also, I’ve included the factors why I’m usually in a bad mood. As always, reading or watching these types of posts won’t do anything, it’s all in your mind and heart. I just want to share my knowledge on this aspect and hopefully it will help at least one of you.
Related: How to live stress free
COMPARING TO OTHERS
I think we’ve all heard everyone say “don’t compare yourself to others, we’re all unique and beautiful in our own way” but it doesn’t change the fact that once in awhile you catch yourself comparing to others and instantly feel bad about yourself.
In this day and age, it’s very easy to fall into this unrealistic trap where everything seems perfect and everyone’s living the best life but in real life, it’s not that way. We all have struggles, insecurities, flaws, problems and issues. Some of us are better at hiding than others, most of the times people don’t understand how blessed and lucky they are and people whom you’re comparing with wish they could reverse their roles with you.
You’ve to realise what you see on the outside isn’t what’s happening on the inside, what you see on social media or on special occasions/family gatherings are only the highlights of people’s best moments.
When it comes to looks, style and personality, everyone is amazing in their own way. The world would be so boring if we all looked and acted the same way! Each person you walk past daily are all different and beautiful in their own way, take a look at everyone and you’ll see how unique and beautiful everyone is.
In life, everyone goes through at a different pace and you don’t need to compete with others because life isn’t a competition. There isn’t a winner nor a loser, we all have different goals and plans in life. Although you may think that others are achieving and moving forward with their life, you’re achieving something and going forward with your life as well.
NOT TAKING CARE OF MY BODY
I always had a healthy lifestyle when I was in France but once I had moved to the UK, everything changed drastically which is completely normal because moving to a different country at a young age isn’t easy and it has a huge impact on yourself.
I was at a very bad place in my life so to escape that I started eating huge portions of meals, I stopped exercising and I’d rarely ever go outside to get fresh air, obviously I gained a lot of weight within a couple of weeks and I went from a size 8 to a size 12.
I never realised how much weight I gained even when my clothes didn’t fit me, it never clicked me. But once I started to get back into my routine (which wasn’t easy at all), I started to be more myself and I was in a much better mood.
All I’m saying is having a healthy lifestyle doesn’t have to do with loosing or gaining weight nor eating junk or healthy foods. Once you start to take care of your body and change your diet, it does have an impact on your happiness!
You can’t change anything overnight, it’s all about taking one step at a time. You don’t have to stop eating chocolates or anything sweet, it’s all about finding a balance and knowing how to control yourself. Trust me when I say when you eat good, you feel good!
NOT BEING THANKFUL
This is something I’ve been doing for over 2 years now, whenever something good happens to me whether it’s something small or huge I’d immediately write it down on my phone in my notes section. So whenever I look at that list, it’s a reminder for me to be thankful and grateful for all the things I’ve and that happened to me.
When something positive happens to you, it’s very easy to put it in the back of your mind whereas when something negative happens, that’s all your mind thinks about. We always give importance to negative things rather than the positive ones so by writing this list, I know I’m not getting sidetracked by any negative thoughts.
NOT BEING HAPPY
I don’t believe in second life that’s the reason why I firmly believe we should make the most out of the life we’ve been given. Me, you and everyone on this planet shouldn’t live to please others! Falling into peer-pressure and doing something that makes you doubt about yourself are only going to make you unhappy and put you on edge.
There’s a huge difference between getting out of your comfort zone and doing something that makes you uncomfortable, most of the times people do the latter option and think they’re getting out of their comfort zone when in fact they’re doing things that don’t make them happy and they don’t feel good at all when doing it.
Being happy is a choice when you do things that make you happy, you instantly feel happy so follow your passion and do things that full fill your heart!
BEING IN A NEGATIVE ENVIRONMENT
It’s really important to surround yourself with positive minded people because that’s the environment you’re going to be in. I’ve learnt this from past friendships and relationships that had gone wrong, when you’re around people that make you feel crap about yourself, belittle you and only have you in their lives for their personal motives and gains – they can’t bring any positive energy to your life!
You’ll only be left with negative energy such as hatred, anger, sadness and literally you’ll feel your energy drain because those types of people feed your energy to make themselves feel better – and you don’t need those types of people in your life!
When someone loves you, they’ll be kind & respectful and more importantly they’ll understand you. Those are the people that you’ll want to keep for a lifetime.
STRESSING TOO MUCH
Whenever something stressful happens to you or you feel like you can’t do something, ask yourself these questions:
Will this matter in a few weeks or months? Is it the worst thing you’ve gone through?
If what you’re going through won’t matter in a couple of weeks then why should it matter right now? Thinking about the most stressful time in your life will put everything into perspective, if you were able to go through those times then you most probably will go through this as well!
NOT TAKING CARE OF MYSELF
Taking care of yourself is a must if you want to feel happy. It’s not always about looking presentable and put together but looking after yourself.
Pamper yourself, relax and do things that make you happy. It doesn’t matter how busy you’re on an everyday basis, take time to yourself and do your favourite things whether it’s watching a TV show, reading a book or even spending quality with your loved ones.
We can all agree there are things in our lives that will always be running in the back of our minds. They’ll creep you and make you feel all sort of things which aren’t good for either your soul and mind.
The only way to remove those negative energies is by learning to forget and move on. I find that forgiving is a huge step because in all honesty, it’s really hard for me to forgive and forget someone who has done cruel things to me. It takes real strength and maturity in order to forgive a person who has done bad things to you.
There are certain things you can’t let go because they can be unforgivable but think about the positive aspect of it. You learnt valuable life lessons from those experiences and you won’t make those same mistakes again.
GIVING IMPORTANCE TO HATERS
Most people think the term “haters” refer to strangers online who don’t have anything else to do apart from judging and criticising your every move but the truth is, it’s doesn’t necessarily mean online people, you might have haters in your real life as well.
Whether it’s the ones who are supposed to be your family/friends or people in your work/school environment. You’ll face people who will judge every decision you make and will scrutinise every step you take. Those people might want you to do good but nothing better than them. Their only goal is to pin you down!
The most important thing you’ve to remember is the way they act doesn’t have anything to do with you! You could do the kindest thing in the world and there will still be people who will find something negative or wrong to say about it. The only thing I can say is to let go of these people and not give a damn about what they say!
NOT HAVING A POSITIVE MIND
This one was the most difficult one because having a positive mindset doesn’t happen overnight or in a click. As I said from the beginning, it’s something that happens within yourself and not by reading books or watching videos.
Seeing the good in everything that happens to you whether it’s something good or bad, saying good morning, smiling at a random person, spreading positive vibes will attract positive vibes in your life. But most importantly, those little things you implement in your life will make you feel good about yourself and make you happy.
I’ve been thinking about writing a blog post about my life in the UK as a french
girl young woman which will include more lifestyle & psychological elements in terms of relationships, friendships, people’s personality, more like a blog post based around people (obviously I can include any other things you want me to talk about).
I want to compare both France and the UK in those elements + things people don’t really talk about so if any of you are thinking about moving to study or to settle abroad then you’d know what to expect especially young people. I wish I’d known all these things before because it would have helped me so much, so let me know in the comments if you’re interested or have any questions you want me to answer!
PS. La raison pour laquelle je n’ai pas écrit ce post en français parce que c’était déjà trop long et je ne voulais pas que mon post soit encore plus long. J’espère que vous comprendrez!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING!